Losing steam...

Help me, I'm losing steam!

I have been really struggling to stay motivated. I went to the gym today and on Wednesday, but it was like pulling teeth to get my arse out the door. I was practically dragging myself there against my own will. haha

I only have one week left of bootcamp and I've gained a few pounds in the 10 day hiatus I took. It snowballed from missing one class to missing a whole week or more of tracking and exercising. It's amazing how easy it is to just skip once, skip twice, and then next thing you know you haven't been to gym in nearly two weeks!

I did go to my last few classes, and I won't be missing any more, but I'm struggling to get back to tracking and drinking water, and ultimately CARING about weight loss.

I think a good week back on plan may cure this motivation lull, but we'll see. I have a really busy week coming up with practicum and whatnot, but that will help me plan and journal, because I have to be packing lunches the night before.

Sigh!!

At least I did a killer spin & weights class tonight, to counteract the two big vegan cookies I ate today :P

WI Week 9

Bootcamp Start Weight: 231
Previous Weight: 213
Current Weight: 209
Current Loss: 4 lbs
Total Loss: 22 lbs

Overall Total Loss: 146 lbs

Down 4 this week!
I'm coming up on 150 lbs down, and closing in on leaving the 200's forever!

I am feeling very motivated and plan to have a repeat of my awesome week :)

WI tomorrow

Why do I always get nervous the night before weigh in?

Did I eat too much today? Did I eat too little?
Did I have too much salt? Will my loss still show tomorrow?
How late is too late to be drinking water or tea??

I've been doing this for four years... you'd think I'd be cool as a cucumber the night before weigh in. But I'm not... haha

Even though I know I'll show a loss tomorrow, and even though I am having all these other positive things happen for me, I still get the jitters on the night before weigh in!!

Gahh.

:)

Excellent Week :)

I am having the best week that I have had in MONTHS! I have been totally 100% on plan with my food, making healthy choices, tracking every little bit and drinking lots of water. I have gone to they gym, hot yoga, or both everyday this week!

The scale is reflecting kindly and I'm aiming to get under 210 this week!

I am so exited... I am starting to FEEL small. My body fits into normal clothes. I don't stick out like a sore thumb in photographs. I ENJOY exercise and healthful foods!

I remember a time when this was the future... and this was something I wasn't even sure I could achieve. I'm here, I persisted, and I'm looking forward to the next leg of journey!!

:)

Dear Body...

Dear body,

I am sorry for everything I have put you through. You took it so well, without even complaining. I would stuff you fill of high fat, high sodium, low-nutrient garbage and animal products, yet you still would function. You never betrayed me and gave out on me. You avoided diabetes or heart problems. I made you fat, I stretched you out to the point of irrepair; I neglected you and despised you. I resented you. I am sorry, for this is all my fault.

Body, I love you. I thank you for the wonderful beautiful places you help me see, the people you let me know, and the things you help me do. You are strong and resilient. I love it when we work together to achieve a common goal. I am trying to make you healthy again. I promise to move you every day, and in many new and different ways. I promise to keep you taken care of with the proper nutrition and vitamins you need to function. I promise to drink lots of fresh, clean water to keep you hydrated and running properly. I want you to be around and at your best for a very long time.

I will no longer put you down or call you names. I want to think of you like a friend, an entity separate from myself. I would never say such mean things about a friend. I wouldn’t stare at a friend in disgust or think about how my friend could be so much better. I will encourage you, compliment you, and embrace you for what you have to offer.

Body, you are beautiful. Your hair is straight, an envy of many others. Your eyes are expressive and have pretty orange flecks in them. Your nose is cute as a button, the kind you see on babies or cartoon characters. Your mouth is small, so don’t use it to shout (unless you’re shouting for a cause). Your shoulders are tanned, your arms strong. Your hands remind me of my mothers. I even have to like the skin on your stomach, it is soft and pale. Your hips are proportionate and womanly, your thighs have a nice shape. Your calves are muscular and can hold any stance. I have worked hard to get here and now I see I should have loved you all along, this may not have gone so far had I loved you and treated you like a friend from the beginning.

Please accept my deepest, most heartfelt apologies. Please forgive me. I promise to treat you with nothing but respect and loving kindness for the rest of my life.

Yours always,

Heather

Sunday WI

Down 2lbs, which is pretty darn good considering I missed bootcamp twice this week and didn't watch what I ate, had major stress, etc etc...

I am going to try to step it up a notch this week. There are only 4 WI's left for this bootcamp so if I want to lose that 13 lbs - or even get CLOSE - I'm going to need to give it some serious effort!

I don't know if 13 lbs in 4 weeks is doable for me at this stage of the game, but hey - I can try. My goal was to have it off by New Years Eve, so I'll still be satisfied with that!

Hot Yoga & the Miracle WI

This week has been a very long, hard, stressful week. My blog has maintined silence. The message boards have seen little of me. The gym? I forget what it looks like on the inside.

I have been in my teaching practicum with a very demanding sponsor, so I am in class on my feet all day, then home and marking/lesson planning at night, with no time to even DREAM about my expensive fitness bootcamp that I was missing.

Absence makes the heart go fonder, that's for sure. I miss the gym!!

Between the fact that I was stressed, I hadn't been to the gym in 4 days, I'd been eating salty post-Halloween pumpkin seeds, and it's just before my period - The scale was showing me UP... a LOT.

I knew it was mostly water retention, but it still sucked.

Last night I went to Mokesha Hot Yoga. I hadn't been in over a year and I forgot how much I love it!! Anyways - I weighed myself before I went, and I weighed myself when I got home...

a difference of 5 POUNDS! I sweated out 5 freaking pounds in one hour. It was glorious... I practically squealed on the scale!

I weighed myself this morning after a 10 hour sleep, and I was down to my lowest weight. Ever. Another 3 lbs gone in my sleep.

I think between salty foods, lack of exercise, stress, lack of sleep, and PMS, I was holding ALLLLLL that water in my body. I could feel it, too. A really great sweating session and a good night sleep FIXED it! I don't feel heavy anymore!

I may have to sign up for a weekly hot yoga session... perhaps on the day before (or of?) weigh in?? haha.